December 2008
Anna: then the moon people came for kaguya
Anna: or something
Anna: because shes lunarian
Anna: but then she drank the potion of immortality and they banished her to the earth with mokou and erin
Anna: to live with the bunnies
Brett: if someone was invited into that segment of the conversation
Brett: do you know how crazy you woulda seemed
I GET YOU ANNA
Zuke: that was cute
Zuke: a spanish guy called
Zuke: and hes like asking for pablo
Zuke: and im like no sorry you have the wrong number
Zuke: this is while i have like
Zuke: "MY CHRISTMAS TREE IS DELICIOUS" in the background
Zuke: and i had to regain my composure
Alexa: LMAO
Zuke: so im like sorry, wrong number.. happy holidays C:
Zuke: and he says whats your name?
Zuke: and i said lauren
Zuke: and hes like oh.. happy holidays and he hung up
Alexa: errr
Zuke: am i gonna get raped
1 tag
Zuke: grammar is hard for everyone but i cant think of correct vocab for the life of me
Zuke: THATS WHERE YOU COME IN!
Alexa: YES
Alexa: if i was a class in a jrpg i would be
Alexa: GRAMMAR MAGE
Zuke: oh lmao
Zuke: i would be
Zuke: lets see
Alexa: you would be
Alexa: well i dont want to narutard this shit but
Zuke: please do
Alexa: one of those guys who carries around a paintbrush and whatever they draw comes to life to fight for them
Zuke: i used to draw me and my friends as OMG I WANTED THAT POWER
Zuke: SO BAD I WOULD DREAM OF IT
Zuke: i used to draw me and my friends as ninjas
Zuke: i was a ninja from the dream village
Zuke: which didnt exist in reality ONLY WHEN YOU WERE ASLEEP...
Zuke: and i had slippers
Alexa: THAT'S MAD SWEET
Zuke: I KNOW
Zuke: THEN I MADE LIKE
Zuke: MY FRIEND THE NINJA OF THIS LIKE UNDERGROUND VILLAGE THING
Zuke: SO SHE WAS LIKE THE DIRTY GUY FROM CHARLIE BROWN
Zuke: WITH THE DUST CLOUD AND SHIT
Alexa: HAHAHA
Alexa: you are amazing
Alexa: why dont you just write and illustrate your own childrens books goddamn
Alexa: you are amazing
Alexa: i would buy all of them and i dont even have kids
Alexa: i would have kids just to buy them your books
Zuke: I have a cat, I'm quiet and work nights so it's like you'd have the place to yourself
give me a call at *** *** ****
Eric
cats are OK - purrr
Zuke: AW THIS person is very cute
Zuke: if i had a car this would be easier
GG: awww
Zuke: i bookmarked them
Zuke: wel here is my plan
Zuke: get a job near where i live now
Zuke: put money aside FIRST for a car/liscense
Zuke: its important that i have transportation before i give myself places to go to
GG: yeah you can always live in your car
GG: FFFFFFFFFF
GG: FUCK YOU
Zuke: our tumblr
Zuke: Because its ours
Zuke: okay good night
GG: i look so untelligent
GG: FHDHSFDSF
Zuke: you ned to watch thos
GG: unintelligent...
GG: DSFIJDLSF
GG: can you just do me a fav
Zuke: I look so untelligent
GG: and cahnge that to
GG: FUCK
GG: change THAT SHIT
Zuke: everyone always asks me to fix their typos
Zuke: and i go No.
Zuke: I like it this way.
GG: i know you do
GG: you dirty, dirty girl
Zuke: nipples harden
GG: hipples narden
GG: narnia
GG: OH GOD DONT FUCK THE LION
Zuke: the secret narden
GG signed off at 4 05 05 AM.
GG is offline and will receive your IMs when signing back in.
GG: liz feldman...
GG: you ned to watch thos
GG: its our humor exactly
GG: shes me if i was funnier
Zuke: were
GG: HAHA !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GG: FUCK YOU
GG: i just jizzed in my pants.
Auto Response from Zuke: I am away from my computer right now.
GG signed off at 1 36 01 AM.
GG is offline and will receive your IMs when signing back in.
Zuke: lets go to new york, we can solve ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff crimes and rapes wlel
GG: klfdjSLDFKJSDF
GG: Goes to New York
GG: sees Mariska
GG: OMG OLIVIA ARE YOU ON THE JOB??
GG: Um...
GG: That's just a role.
Zuke: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
GG: NO IT'S NOT
GG: NO IT'S FUCKING NOT
Zuke: DONT YOU LIE BITCH
GG: WILL YOU FIND MY RAPIST
GG: AND MAKE SURE HE GOES TO JAIL....FOR GOOD. (or the maximum sentence, which is like 10 years lol)
1 tag
Alexa: ohoho you card
Zuke: bitch wut u call me
Alexa: a CARD
Alexa: the ace of SPAAAAAADES
Zuke: i love that song!
Zuke: no i dont really but
Zuke: there really is only 3 different responses to song lyrics
Zuke: "i love that song", continuing to sing it, or the awkward laugh
Alexa: or my personal favorite
Alexa: "shut the fuck up and get a real response to my conversation you vapid whore"
Anna doesn’t know it yet, but I modded all her touhou games to play britney spears songs instead of the usually ZUN masterpieces.
sounds like the premise for a dr. seuss book
Zuke: wtf is vore, i feel like i have looked it up before and i was scarred by it
milewda: digestion fetish
Zuke: lmao wtf
milewda: being eaten, eatinga nother, watching the process
milewda: etc
Zuke: weird
milewda: I think it's mostly the eating part
Zuke: whatever bakes someones pickle
Zuke: i thought it meant
Zuke: the wish to be birthed from an animal while inside an egg
Zuke: i dont
Zuke: know why
milewda: no, that's called laying eggs, isn't it
Zuke: yeah but
Zuke: like you want to be inside the egg
Zuke: and it could be any animal
Zuke: like an elephant
Zuke: you want to be birthed as an egg from an elephant
Zuke: IDK
milewda: I don't even know if that exists
Zuke: where i even
Zuke: i hope not
milewda: what about you
Zuke: drawan wriggle
milewda: wiggles
Zuke: awwww
Zuke: oh the wiggles are gross
Zuke: but wiggles is cute
milewda: what is the wiggles
Zuke: its this kid show and its like
Zuke: 5 grown men in star trek suits
Zuke: singing about fruit and pirates
Zuke: its very Rainbow
milewda: sounds like it
milewda: is it british
Zuke: yup
milewda: soudns like it.
Zuke: i hate my life alexa
Zuke: i went downstairs
Zuke: to pee
Zuke: and the bathroom door was closed
Zuke: i heard water running
Zuke: i knocked and im like i need to pee
Zuke: my mom is like PATT lauren needs to pee
Zuke: and im like but hes in the shower
Zuke: and hes like
Zuke: NO IM PEEING
Zuke: I HATE MY LIFE
Alexa: oh my god
Alexa: *leaves*
Zuke: -trees-
Alexa: FFFFFFFFFFF
Auto Response from Zuke: I THINK MY PARENTS ARE HAVING SEX I HATE MY LIFE
Zuke: KILL
Zuke: ME
Alexa: NOOO
Alexa: JUST BREATHE THROUGH THE HORROR
Zuke: WHY GOD
Zuke: I HAVE EARPLUGS IN
Zuke: BUT
Zuke: NOTHING CAN FILTER MY PAIN
Alexa: you should go in and ask for 20 bux
Zuke: no i should go in and no i shouldnt go anywhere near them1!!
Alexa: or that
Zuke: i have to pee so bad but im afraid to go downstairs
Alexa: blindfold yourself
GG: My wow account has died.
GG: holds out lich king
GG: Did It?
Zuke: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Zuke: LFDSMKJDGJKFDHGNDFG
Zuke: LMGFOASHD
Zuke: HEEEEEEEEEAVES
GG: FFFFFFFFFF
whaqt
Zuke: therese things called corpse harvesters
Zuke: and they have webs in the air
Zuke: and they skitter around
Zuke: and its horrible
Oreo: thank you for sharing that story with me
Oreo: im going to go kill every spider in the fucking world
Zuke: let me show you them
Zuke: yeah i dont think youve recoveryed yet
Oreo: yeah no not really
Oreo: *ptsd
Zuke: http://www.wowhead.com/?npc=25445#screenshots:id=93262
Zuke: and it skitters around at high speeds
Oreo: JESUS CHRIST
Zuke: FFF
Zuke: you really have to see it in motion
Oreo: no but really i think i'd rather eat my own face then see it in motion
Zuke: the thing isFF they are flying spiders
Zuke: so they "walk" through the air
Zuke: im jus chillin in flight form
Zuke: then BAM
Zuke: BAT SPIDER
Oreo: hey remember that time
Zuke: they chase you in the air too
Oreo: that you told me about terrible flying spiders that harvest corpses and i cried
Oreo: good times
Zuke: i dont recall